Don’t worry, this is not an article about New Year’s resolutions. This is about knowing that you are enough and it is enough. It refers to anything you do in your life. The amount you exercise each day, how hard you exercised, how fast you ran and the work you got done. Also, the chores you finished and the love you provided your children with. When do you decide? How do you decide it’s enough?
Recently, I attended the Woman of the Year celebration in Park City. As I listened to all the accomplishments of the winner, I couldn’t help from thinking, I could never do that much. I could never achieve so much. It seems almost impossible to do so much so well, and from there a sense of failure began to enter my mind. I challenged myself to continue to listen, to support her, to think good thoughts about myself. I found myself continuing to think, “Is this what we are about? How would my daughter feel right now in this room? Hopeless? Incapable? Do we focus on expectations so much we end up missing the moment? Are our standards or expectations so high that we are never able to obtain them? If we do obtain them do we really experience happiness and fulfillment?”
I left full of mixed emotions, wondering how I feel “It’s enough.” I’ve been pondering this question now for a few months listening, thinking, feeling and sensing. During this time I’ve come to wonder how many of us are lacking self- love and acceptance for whatever we did that day. Often I hear friends and colleagues say, “Oh, I should have run a faster PR. I should have been first in this race. I should have trained harder. I only ran 16 miles today. If I sleep in that’s too lazy. I should add in another marathon because I only did five this year.” These are just a few examples I witness daily.
Many of us are living with expectations and demands that cause us to miss out on the moment. How often have we heard or read the message of ‘being present’? I’m speaking to the depth of the presence, which is to love, to accept and to embrace whatever you have done as perfect and good enough.
Trust me, I’m not suggesting that we shouldn’t have goals or dreams. By all means they are truly important. They provide us with a sense of direction and determination. But even in a goal, when do we feel it is good enough? As I head out the door to run I’m given once again the opportunity to feel, to be present, to witness, to enjoy all that I am in that moment.
Over the past couple months, I have come to realize that one of the most precious gifts I received from The Feldenkrais Method, and in my training is discovering and developing self-image which includes self-regulation, knowing when to stop or back off or when I can go further. It’s trusting my ability to know what is right for me at the moment and that what is right for me, is all that matters. It takes presence, awareness and a desire to be connected with one’s self.
Perhaps you can begin discovering how you know when it’s enough, how you self-regulate and how you honor and love yourself in the moment. It’s enough.